Things Your Family & Business Can Learn From Our Trip To Carnival in Panama

We just came back from Carnival in Las Tablas. Panama. As exciting as it is it’s also very loud and crowded, so to rest from all the excitement we stayed in a beautiful beach villa in Pedasi, right on a cliff overlooking the ocean. The sunrises and sunsets there are as gorgeous the ones we see daily from our 15th floor condo in Coronado where we are staying for 3 months.

Each year during Carnival, Las Tablas splits into two competing factions, “Calle Arriba” (Uptown, literally “Street Above”) and “Calle Abajo” (Downtown / Street Below), both centered on two streets of the same name. Each faction has a carnival queen, a parade, fireworks, music, a decorated plaza, food stands, presentations, concerts, surveys, games, contests, etc., all attempting to overpower the other faction’s efforts.

It provoked my desire to speak about what is healthy competition between partners as they are building their business, as well as between couples and their competing egos as they are building their lives together. And if they are building both the subject becomes even more relevant.

THE IMPORTANCE OF PLAYFULNESS:

• Healthy competition can spur both partners to achieve great things, IF THEY TREAT IT PLAYFULLY.
• By stretching toward targets, imposing tight time frames, adding cooperation and communication, and with compassionate emotional support each spouse can perform at a far higher level than would be the case without the stimulation of their “inner competitor”.
• When managed effectively, PLAYFUL competition can deliver a wealth of benefits. It can provide spouses with the motivation they need to work harder and smarter and exceed objectives.
• It can engender greater commitment to quality as both spouses seek to use this as a lever to better their “competitor”.
• Playful competition can serve as a spark to creativity as couples seek out all possible avenues to “get ahead” and “perform” for each other.
• And just imagine what PRIZES the winner can get. 

But, as Las Tablasty understand, and I keep saying, it’s how we play the game that matters, not getting caught up in actual identification of the ego as to “who is better”, “who did better”, or “whose role is more important in the couple’s business and/or relationship”. Another way to put it is to remember that all the pieces go back into the same box when the game is over.

Now, going back to the dangers of competition and why the trip to Carnival in Las Tablas inspired me to think about it.

DON’T LITTER WHEE YOU GLITTER:

Among all wonderful things about the festival – the music, the costumes, the adrenaline rush as you merge with the raving crowds, the amount of trash on the streets of the town is unbelievable. People treat the space in which they live and celebrate completely unconsciously; throwing empty alcohol bottles, cans, garbage, etc. right where they stand.

So, my advice quite literally is – please don’t crap where you eat. And in the context of a family business, or any other venture really, don’t bring your inner trash into the relationship that bring you joy, and your work. All your inner insecurities, angers, desire for revenge and all other impurity – find a trash can and release it there. Make sure you aren’t dumping on your partner. No, your partner does not have to receive your trash. They are where you invest your sweetest love and light. You are an adult human being, and only you are responsible for your “healing”, for becoming conscious and accountable for your impulses and behaviors.

YOUR DAILY CHECKLIST:

1. Have you spent at least 15 minutes in the morning aligning your energies, getting rid of emotional residue from dreams or past events?
2. Have you become present to your mind chatter and reduced your identification with the endless thoughts trying to pull you in different directions?
3. Have you noticed your tendency to identify with those thoughts, believe in them and thus fuel garbage emotions (sadness, anger, guilt) that will show up in your interactions and turn a game of playful competition into an actual power struggle?
4. Can you say for sure that you haven’t used your spouse as a punching bag just so you can feel better?
5. Have you recognized, identified and let go of anxieties, insecurities and anger that arose in you when your spouse accomplished something faster or with a better result?
6. Have you taken care of your body, mind and “soul”, so you can function with more ease and resilience?

With all that said… have fun!

See competition with your partner as a game, and play it as such. And play fair.

What a magnificent life it is when two people are both striving for the wellbeing of the other more than their own, and make their journey together a life-long adventure!

Life in its entirety is the game. So, have fun playing, my friends.

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